I consider myself a very frank person.

That isn’t true.  I mean, I do consider myself to be frank but in reality I’m not that frank.  Sometimes I wish I was as frank as I think I am.

The biggest thing getting in the way of my frankness?  Other people’s feelings.  It’s the reason I can’t tell people that they’re fun-suckers or need more mousse or that I don’t trust them because they told that one thing to that one person that once.

The other thing getting in the way is that I don’t want people to think badly of me.  Which I want you to know I consider a serious flaw.

So from now on I am going to be frank without crushing anyone’s feelings.  I figure it’s better to get it out there in the open immediately.  Why not from the first moment of the relationship?  You never know where a friendship will go and honesty is the best policy they say.

Hello, my name is Rebecca.  I’ve never tried very hard at anything because most things come too easy for me.  As a result, all my effort is mediocre.

I can do it for other people I know too.

Hello, my name is __.  I think about my split ends more than the economic crisis.

Hello, my name is __.  I try to get people’s attention by wearing short skirts and accusing them of hating me when they don’t call back.

Hello, my name is __.  I love my mom more than my fiancée.

Hello, my name is __.  I do my best to make other people feel inferior so that they won’t notice my insecurity.

This would all be easier if someone would just start a custom-made t-shirt business where you write your flaws confessions frankness on a t-shirt so you can skip saying it out loud.  Then even strangers can appreciate how honest you are.  Someone better jump on that idea quick.  It’s hot.

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